08 June 2014

Ruined by His Grace


I am learning more and more about the beautiful meaning of Grace. It is not a one time understanding. It is not a jar filled to the top, close the lid, and put a cute label on it to stow away. It's an endless, vast, mere grasp of something we could never run a race to finish. It is not a ‘Personal Record’ or an Arrival where you pull into a drive-way and walk into a home filled with a Full understanding. It is a growing, age by age & stage by stage in which it seeps into your mind, soul, heart and Spirit while being renewed daily. I guess that means I can tell you better about what it's not. 

Is it not true how we will go our own routes over there^ 
       and over here< 
              to maybe that way--
                    and possibly standing still ::                                      when we’re supposed to move>> 
just to Avoid the full endowment of it working at & IN our lives?
We can very much learn a beautiful blessing in one experience in our lives, and hang every day--every conversation,  and encouragement for another on this one peg of Grace, and heck, it’s an unlimited pipe of rushing water, 
but God doesn't let us just stay there. 

He pulls us even deeper and close to Him.

Justice's Kinder graduation 6/7/14
Some things seem so unbearable to experience, but once we get to the other side, don’t we often think, 'I’m so glad he took me here?' It was tough, but it was treasurable, made of priceless & endless currency. He is good! 

Santorini
Caleb and I just recently returned from our get-away to a little island on the outskirts of Greece. We waited and saved to be able to go and celebrate our Marriage on a beautiful island. 
Looking back, it seems like a dream!

We decided to take an ATV out and drive around the island. It was so much fun! But I wouldn't exactly say that at first. When we looked at the map, it showed us how to get to the Lighthouse we were heading for, but when we arrived it was a LOT of up hill with turns and curves edging cliffs that we could clearly fly right off into an abyss of deep down valley. Wow! It was an outrageous and lovely, yet dangerous feeling! The view could not be justified with words. It was a freedom- as if dancing in the wind of Beauty.We drove all over that island on our ATV; just me and him.

The hang- up though, was how it seemed the power steering was super tight. {I'm sure for the brilliant reasoning of NEWBY's getting control of a powerful vehicle on a crazy cool island!}


At first, to feel in control, you used all of your arm strength each and every turn, and barely used your thumb to push the gas. It became tiring, because you still didn't feel like you had full control as it would easily turn or wobble the back end for every move. Man, being the passenger was frightening in those first hours...
 But then soon, as you learn to try pushing a little more gas, the power of the motor would take you up, versus using every bit of  your arm strength. One soon learns how to manoeuvre the vehicle to use the least of yourself and more of the power.


And I got to thinking. . .  that's how God wants to work in our lives. It always seems a struggle as we try in our strength to accomplish physical or more importantly spiritual things. And first of all, He has already done the work, He wants to continually do it even still. . .
His pleasure is not in the strength of the horse,
    nor his delight in the legs of the warrior;
11 
the Lord delights in those who fear him,

    who put their hope in his unfailing love. Psalm 147:10


But he said to me, 
"My grace  is sufficient for you, for my power is made PERFECT in weakness.
Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. 2 Corinthians 12:9

I believe, in my own life He will often teach me something, and he brings me to a place that is Amazing & Beautiful, where I sit untangled- joyful & thankful in the palm of His hands- and as time carries on- I will walk so Freely in His Grace, 
but then I forget to ask Him, or seek Him
and soon, I am working in my own strength, Seeking after the things of this world.
 I live in a little less grace, a little less fellowship with Him, and  the walls come closing in.  {Then} I  will set a limit in what I Can or Cannot do. I create a Law of my own And it’s a funny thing, that it will work for a few days…Until.
Until, I Fail. 
I can't last or even remain as I began. 
But the truth is, we can last for a while before we fail. Right?
One of the greatest indicators that I have created A Law or Rule in my own heart, rather than living in His Freedom, is the lack of joy in my life.
Legalism creates a brick wall on both sides of me, and there is no give. 
I can't get over it, and I can't break through. 
I am in need, I want, I am not satisfied. I long for lots of Things, and exchange Truths for Lies.
I have created a Law in my head that I have to live up to, but I cannot succeed!

G:::R:::A:::C:::E 
Grace began with God and will never end-- because of God.

I believe the best way to go about stopping this cycle- is worship. Worship Him! Worship through asking, praying, singing, seeking Him. Let His Word come at you & through you!

I see a wall of ruins in my mind's eye.
All the rubble of an old wall that was there. A pile of broken down fortress that used to form into a Law I carried heavy, and I would take the same tiring routes, but just cannot anymore. It's not satisfying to  go the same way I used to go. I fall down to my knees in this pile of rubble that tries to build itself back up again. His Grace just washes over me like a wave of cool air, and keeps those rocks to the ground.
His gift is Everything.
I am ruined by His Grace.
I pray that you are inspired by this. Inspired by my weakness, INcouraged by His Strength. It's endless and tireless! He is a mighty GOD! And one day every knee will bow and every tongue will confess it. He Is Lord!
LATELY
So we have just finished out the semester here at the Bible College; it's been a wonderful growing experience loving and learning with these students! 
Caleb got to lead a 10 day outreach to Dublin, Ireland, and the most special part of it all was our oldest daughter, Charis went with him to share in the ministry of outreach. Praise the Lord! 
I was blessed to go to Kyrgyzstan with some friends & spiritual giants, Pam Markey, and Melanie Billings to encourage the church plant there! The Ladies were some of the most beautiful people I have come across! So loving and giving and I will be forever be changed by that experience. I learned to keep learning! I loved the questions that both Pam and Melanie inquired or shared to the church in order to encourage the strengthening in that church. 
Praise the Lord for lasting Fruit!

Justice has turned 6 this March and had a Pirate birthday, and Charis had her golden birthday and turned 10 on the 10th of April! She had an Artist's party! 

As I said before, Caleb and I got a little Lovee rendezvous to Athens & Santorini, Greece! We first met up with dear missionary friends, Frank & Suzie Gonzalez, and walked along the ancient ruins, as we stopped to see the Acropolis, the Parthenon,& Mars Hill where Paul spoke of the 'Unknown God'.
Then onto a little long awaited anniversary time. We will be celebrating 
12 years this year; Praise the Lord!
Here's looking out our front door on Day 2.

We are currently in the slightly calm period, before the storm as the biggest conference we have this summer will be next week! It's our 'Foundations' week, and we will be hosting missionaries from around the world, here for a time of refreshment and learning with the likes of Pastor Brian Brodersen of Calvary Chapel Costa Mesa, David Guzik, the prolific Bible Commentator and Pastor of Calvary Chapel Santa Barbara, and many more warriors currently on the field!

My heart is praying for Caleb, as he is taking on heaps with God's grace and the help of the 'Summer of Service' crew as he is leads the Bible College, SOS, and our incoming A Vision for Life discipleship training school!
This is close to our heart, as a 6 week program where kiddos from the ages of 14-24 come and get changed right before our eyes! We have a killer team of help forging on in prayer and daily tasks before they arrive! -We will head out into the surrounding countries of Europe as God moves HUGE in their lives!
  • Please pray for strength and health for Caleb and all he has to take on this season
  • Please pray for AVFL that the enemy would not have a foothold, and God would be glorified through ours and their hearts to worship Him
  • Please pray for our Family; We need your prayers to sustain us!
We've been finishing up homeschooling this year; Justice just finished {Ovoda} Hungarian Kindergarten, and all 4 will be heading into an all-Hungarian-speaking school this coming semester in September. Just to give you an idea, the teachers will be teaching all subjects strictly in Hungarian, so the kiddos will inevitably struggle, but our prayer is that God moves miraculously in their minds.

  •  Please pray for their hearts not to be lonely, for the language to be learned, (even now as they prepare with Ms. Isabella) and for God to bring favor as they step out in faith. They know that they are becoming like a bridge into the people-and want to share the Love of Christ.

And as I close, I am reminded of this sweet little story of Justice the other day. After I had just told all the kids to pipe down, as they kept running by the sliding glass windows, shouting while building forts, and welcoming the coming storm, Justice stops, looks in the window and knocks. He gets my attention, and I see him smile at me and shoots me a kiss. Then he moved back to his boisterous moves. It didn't hit me till he walked away how precious that moment on the other side of the glass was. My 6 year old stopped to send his love. 
Not expected, undeserved. 
That's Grace.

                                            Thank you for reading! 
In His Love,


2 comments:

Isabella said...

Beautiful words - wonderful testimonies - of our Amazing God! Thanks!
I love you Kimmie, and am so thankful to see you walking and growing
in grace, pouring all you are into these lovely kiddos and everyone around.
You are such a beautiful woman of God!
Thank you for entrusting these little ones in my care for a few hours each
week and for allowing me to be part of this adventure! Köszönöm! =)
I love you! ♥
"The path of the righteous is like the morning sun,
shining ever brighter till the full light of day."
Proverbs 4:18

Kimberly said...

Thank You so much, Bella! I love your heart to see the best in everybody! That's LOVE!!! And Thank you for the verse! Love you!